So much of my life has been in my head and manufactured. Growing up in the suburbs with a non-nature inclined family, I spent my growing up years in the house and in the city. I learned how to swim at the local YMCA pool and took piano lessons.
It wasn't until I started into adulthood that I began running and cycling, then hiking/tramping. I started noticing how diet, sleep and exercise affected my body. I dipped into growing food. Years later, I burnt out.
And now I'm learning to experience things in my body. Last year was deeply grief-filled and I noticed my jaw clenching and how my skin was very irritated. Walks and runs in the bush and by the ocean helped.
As we prepare to put down a much-loved sheep in my community, a pre-teen kid and I spent a couple evenings digging a hole. As we shoveled dirt and grubbed rocks, I told the kid about how our bodies need things like this to mourn. Our physical actions mimic our emotional state and help us process.
We'll say goodbye to Smudge next week. She has been friendly and loving toward me (and others) since my first visit to the community so we'll miss her greatly, but I feel more prepared for her passing with my body having had a chance to work through my emotions.
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